This is Leicestershire -- BBC Radio Leicester presenters, Tony Wadsworth, 65, and Julie Mayer, 56, have been married for nearly 20 years and live in south Leicestershire with their cat, Flossy.--------------------
I was working at the Haymarket theatre, doing all sorts, including looking after the wardrobe department, when I first met Tony. He needed a costume for an outside broadcast and came in to see if we had something suitable. I wasn't particularly attracted to him at first. I just remember he made me laugh. It was a difficult task finding something to fit, him being a small man. I ended up going into the children's department. I must have talked him to death because he said to me, "have you ever thought about going into radio?" He invited me to the BBC to have a look around. I guess my curiosity got the better of me. He took me out on an interview and set me up with all sorts of equipment to have a go at broadcasting myself. I realised I had a creative side I'd never seen before – I'll always be grateful to Tony for that. He basically showed me the ropes. We became good friends – Tony was a mentor to me. It was nothing more than platonic to begin with. We were both in relationships, we both had young children. It was difficult to allow our relationship to blossom. If I'm honest, I was falling in love with Tony without realising it. I knew I loved him long before I should have done. There was an inevitability about us. It was one of those things, there was no point fighting against it. We just wanted to do the right thing by our families. I guess we both "knew" the day he came home from a trip to Egypt and turned up at the radio station. I thought he'd gone home to his family. That moment cemented our relationship. It was six years after we met before we moved in together and could officially declare ourselves a couple. We decided we didn't want to get married until our families had dealt with us being together. Their feelings were paramount. And we wanted them to be there. We got married at the Great Meeting Unitarian Chapel, in Leicester. I'll never forget it – it was a shambles. I arrived at the church, my son, Simon, giving me away, and heard the organist playing. I just assumed it was the music I should be walking down the aisle to, so that's what I did. I got halfway and saw Tony casually sitting on a pew, chatting to a guest. He jumped to his feet, and that's when I realised what I'd done. How embarrassing. It was a great day though. It was important we had all the family there and they were happy for us. The first time we worked together properly was at Pebble Mill. The manager at the time would often catch me and Tony rowing in the corridors. "I want to put that on the radio," he said. There was one stage in our career when Tony became my line manager. It was very stressful. When I went to him for advice, he would treat me differently. He was quite hostile, he expected me to know my stuff. He was clearly over-. I had to call a halt on that and asked to be assigned to someone else. Now, the set-up we're in, with our weekend shows, is great. Working together has worked in our favour. We're a double act – we bounce off each other. I know I can be a bit ditzy, but Tony keeps me on the straight and narrow. He's also very protective and caring. He's my memory for dates, facts and figures. He likes to be right! We can't help that our personal life creeps over into our professional. Subjects for the show are born out of our own disagreements and discussions at home. What you see is what you get. I had a hysterectomy without being put to sleep so I could share it with the listeners; I've talked about having a basal cell carcinoma removed from my forehead and getting my Baywatch boobs done. I felt like a little girl – and I just happened to be married to a man who likes big ones. After years of men staring at my chest, I wasn't that person any more. So I had them whipped out. I did a show that same afternoon. It was no big deal. I think I'm most proud of the fact we've been successful together, professionally, as well as personally. Our Sunday morning Clueless show is really popular. We're market leaders now, trouncing the lot. We're not clones, but we are very similar. There are times Tony cheeses me off in the studio. I'll just walk out on him. I do come back though. I'm professional, if nothing else. *Tony: *We were doing this journey, me and John Florance. It was a charity thing, from Leicester to John O'Groats in a Model T Ford, and we needed to look the part. You know, plus-four breeches and a Norfolk jacket. I ended up talking to Julie at the theatre. That's when we first met. It was an expensive trip as it turned out! I was rather attracted to her backside. Seriously though, I was most attracted to her personality. She's bright and bubbly – most of the time – she has that quality, something very few people possess. She treads where angels fear to. We didn't set out to get involved, to fall in love. We were both in relationships with children. I found it quite terrifying. I don't mind admitting I shed more than a few tears along the way. The last people I wanted to upset and hurt were my children, to lose their love and respect. The point came in 1989, when I was in Egypt, and determined to use the time to get away from Julie, to think. I was travelling the country and at every hotel I went to, there was a message from Julie Mayer at the BBC. She just wouldn't take no for an answer. It was like being dragged into a vortex, I was hanging on by my fingernails. When I arrived back in Leicester, I'd made my mind up it was over. And then I saw her. The John Lennon track, How, was playing. How can I go forward when I don't know which way I'm facing? I asked her to marry me over a message from my computer to hers. Her reply was "log off". It's what she wanted. It's what I wanted, though she'd say I was feeling a bit, "once bitten, twice shy". Our lives were taken up with sorting out personal crap. I needed the blessing of my children and my daughter was very much against it all, to begin with. It was difficult to live with that pain. I wouldn't want to go through it again. The age gap was also a concern. There's almost 10 years between us and I needed Julie to be aware I'm quite the pipe and slippers kind of guy. She said she'd got all that young stuff out of her system anyway. We got married on April 9, 1994, at the Great Meeting Unitarian Chapel. It's where my parents married. Julie camped out overnight. Seriously though, she was that eager she came into the church before the organist had started playing Here Comes the Bride. My son Paul was my best man. The whole family were there. It was a fantastic day. Julie's high maintenance, she really is. She'd admit she's demanding, but she's very lucky to have me; if I hadn't come along, she'd still be on the shelf. I find it hard to get a word in edgeways and I feel like her wife – I do all the cooking and cleaning, now I'm semi-retired. I admire her. Julie taught me how to love. I didn't have the best relationship with my mother. I had the barriers up – I didn't show my emotions. It's terrible, but I don't remember putting my arms around my son or telling him that I loved him. I do that every time I see him now. I admire her feistiness. She doesn't tolerate fools or take crap. I respect her loyalty, too – she has a lot of qualities and values. She's quite forgetful. Lots of things about her drive me mad – as I'm sure they do her about me. What we've learned to do is communicate. That's the secret to the success of any relationship. The boobs – I was reasonably interested in those, but I did impress upon her, she was doing it for her and not me. You can talk and reason with her and she'll listen to everything I have to say; then she'll turn round and do the exact opposite. If born in a different time, Julie would have been a suffragette. She has been extremely jealous and possessive, it dented our relationship to the extreme. I couldn't even look at another women in the early days. She was just scared. She had lost every ounce of self-esteem. It frustrates me that she won't depend on anyone. You do want to protect her. I try. But she is guarded. She only allows it on her own terms. Radio has afforded some wonderful experiences together. But it hasn't gone without its rows. We've had some humdingers. She's got a black-belt in arguing. I control the desk. If she's getting annoying, I can just switch her mic down. That really pisses her off. She normally storms off. But she usually comes back. I'm quite proud of the fact we have made our professional relationship work, because I think there were doubting Thomases. To have a personal and professional relationship go hand-in-hand, well, who could ask for more? Reported by This is 2 days ago.